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January 28, 2012

Mangomanjaro

Giving Birth

Obviously, I didn’t know what it would be like to give birth to a baby. Still, I stayed so convinced throughout my pregnancy that it would be a wonderful experience, and I was surprised to see how many of my girlfriends that came to me and asked me if I wasn’t scared to death. I wasn’t. But all I could do was to give them my personal thoughts about giving birth in general, not knowing if and how they would change when it actually happened. Now I know, and my thoughts haven’t changed a bit. It makes me concerned to see that plenty of young women believe it must be horrible to give birth since I know most of them want to have children. Therefore I’d like to share my experience with you.

It seems to be the fear of pain that scares people the most. I’ve used three helpful thoughts when it comes to going through the pain:

1, The pain itself doesn’t have to be a bad thing, only pain in combination with fear is damaging and traumatic. I read a lot about this in “Att möta förlossningssmärtan” (“Facing the labor pains”) by the Swedish midwife and author Gudrun Abascal, a book I highly recommend. Unfortunately there is no English version yet, only Swedish.

2, No matter how painful it might be, the time of the actual delivery is a fractional part of the looong pregnancy. You’re at the finish line!

3, Every single person on Earth has been born. I kept this in mind every time a walked through a big crowd through my pregnancy. Imagine how many successful births that is!


I can’t say giving birth to Kima didn’t hurt. If it wouldn’t hurt at all people could give birth anywhere out in the streets, which would be a direct danger to the baby. In other words, the pain is useful, it makes you perfectly focused on delivering your baby and nothing but that. Unlike other pain, this is a positive type. It leads you to the first meeting with your child. What a reward after 9 months of carrying it inside you! I guess I could compare it with running a marathon; it’s a huge physical exertion that I’m sure is not only pleasant, but it’s still an amazing experience to go through.

And really, I never found the pain any worse than that I’ve been looking forward to doing it again form the very second our daughter was born. I’m therefore convinced that anybody can manage even the most painful situation — as long as you don’t panic. I didn’t use any medical pain relief either, since the whole process was over in a few hours and I felt alright with just a heating pad and some hot towels. Though I think it’s great that all sorts of pain relief is accessible in modern hospitals, I believe it might make you even more afraid of how much it would hurt WITHOUT medical help, since no pain killers will numb the pain completely.

Another aspect that makes me critical towards using medical pain relief is that I’m not sure I would have felt completely how much and when to push or to take a break etc. And I found this to be the most fascinating part of the process — my body told me EXACTLY what to do and I just had to string along. Somehow I think that makes baby delivering one of the easiest things a woman can do, funny enough! And no matter what happens when you give birth, I’m sure the pride, love and relaxation you feel once you can finally hold your baby in your hand for the first time is the same.

I’d be incredibly happy if I could inspire a future mother or two who might feel anxious about giving birth. I look at my one month old daughter who I’m breastfeeding while i write, and I happily confirm my overwhelming conviction from early in the the pregnancy: Giving birth to her was absolutely wonderful.

by mangomanjaro at January 28, 2012 13:18

January 26, 2012

Hitch The World

Dr. Vargeus

First of all, I want to apologise for leaving anybody who follows this site without news for so long. I assure you that the events of the past two months will be posted here. I hopped freight trains in Minas Gerais, was arrested, spent 1 month in the USA, squatted on the streets of Belém for 11 days, and more. Sadly, it may be some time before I can get them up, as I am deep in the jungle without Internet or electricity.

Excuse this break in the normal rythmn of the posts; I need to post this now, while I have the chance.

Greetings from Altamira, Brazil.

I am currently hitchhiking along the Trans-Amazonian highway through northeastern Pará, on my way to a microscopic town that Google Maps does not show, near the border with the Brazilian state of Mato Grosso.

Of course, the objective at first was simply to get to Macapá without paying. But, overdoer that I am, that soon was not enough in my mind. With every day that went by, I knew I would have to take the longest, hardest, most dangerous route possible. First I was going to start from here, then decided on Santarém. Then Itaituba. Finally, I figured, “go big or go on living life wondering about what you would have found down that unexplored river…”

So I chose Mundico Coelho, the last stop on a dead end gold mining road in southwastern Pará, as the starting place for my journey. I will float 1.356 km (842 mi) down the rivers Mapurá, Crepori, Tapajós, and Amazon. My raft will be constructed of balsa trees, of which there are many here in the Amazon.

River conditions along the Tapajós and Amazon are expected to be relatively danger-free, with reguards to rapids, as they are very wide and this is the height of the rainy season. River conditions along the Mapurá and Crepori are unknown. Will rely on information gathered from locals. Have spotted on SAT photos of the Mapurá what appears to be a waterfall about 100 km downriver from Mundico Coelho. Still not sure what to do about that. Perhaps will have to disassemble raft and pack it downstream.

I am well equipped for jungle, with machete, hatchet, plenty of rope, quinine pills, jungle clothing, extensive fishing gear, various types of mosquito netting, hammock, tarp, and various pots and pans, compass, map, and GPS locator from 2002. I’ve spent the past week learning of edible plants (of which there are MANY here in the Amazon) from a farmer I met somewhere north of Amapú.

While I fully expect to survive this journey, I am also fully aware of the dangers, and the fact that this adventure may be my last (there are no human habitations closer than 80 miles through jungle for the first 300 miles of the trip, most notably along the rivers Mapurá and Crepori). Yet I am a firm believer in the idea that no adventure is truly adventure without the very real possibility of not living to tell the tale. Anyways, I couldn’t think of a better final resting place than the heart of the most wild place on earth. If I do die, rest assured it will have been whilst doing what I love.

My other adventures pale in comparison to this one, which is either the most couragous or the most stupid thing I have ever done. Either way…I’m all over it. Normacly and security were never my cup of tea, anyways.

Hope to post here again. I really do like living and do not have a death wish, despite what some of you may think. Please don’t interpret this as a suicide note of sorts. I merely have a more…erm…flexible point of view, as to what level of danger is too much.

For anybody interested, coordiates of Mundico Coelho are somewhere around 6° 55′ 49.8612 S, 56° 53′ 13.9446 W.

Chao, my friends. Until…we meet again.

-Patrick

EDIT: Next day.

I visited the hospital here in Altamira to attempt to procure necessary medicines. After explaining my travel intentions to the nurse on duty, she took me to see the director, Dr. Vargeus. As luck would have it, he has been to the Crepori area, and was able to give me valuable information reguarding this river.

Due to it being in a gold mining area, it is not as uninhabited as I was led to believe. In fact, Dr. Vargeus assured me there were several malaria laboratories along it’s banks, along with isolated pockets of population, mostly either miners or natives. However, my suspicions that the Crepori has a waterfall were confirmed, along with rapids. Despite this, the director assured me the river is navigated by local boats on a frequent basis, and that the rapids are not so trecherous.

So, a few mysteries of the Crepori have been reveled. Hazards of isolation are expected to be somewhat less, while hazards of navigation may perhaps be more of a risk to my personal well-being. This, of course – like everything else, really – remains to be seen.

Dr. Vargeus has also worked along the sector of the Tapajós where I will be travelling. While there are no modern inhabitants, I am told there are more than fifty indiginous tribes who call this area home. I am assured that none of them are of the head-hunter variety.

The director and another malaria specialist (Dr. Jorge) assured me that malaria is indeed a risk, though that I will probably be able to seek help should I fall victem. Still, I was given as a gift a mess of quinine and cloroquina, which he states “will not cure malaria, but will keep you from becoming incapacitated so as you can seek help in one of our laboratories.” I was also given 50 pills of sulfametoxazol trimetoprima, which I can use as an antibiotic, as well as a way to fend off extreme cholera for long enough to seek help. All without paying anything. In fact, Dr. Vargeus gave me 10 reais and filmed me playing the harmonica in his office for twenty minutes.

Dr. Jorge. Malaria specialist, Altamira, Brazil

Dr. Vargeus, Director, General Hospital of Altamira, Brazil

Thanks, guys.

All right, now I’m really outta here.

-MN


Filed under: Brazil

by MN at January 26, 2012 22:34

January 22, 2012

walterheck.com

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-01-23

RT @tribily: Recommended reading: Getting rid of dependency on #google services: #piwik http://t.co/8BDfsIYX #googlealternatives #analytics # Powered by Twitter Tools

by walterheck at January 22, 2012 23:19

Mikael Korpela

Pekka Haavisto vai Sauli Niinistö?

Suomen vaakunaPuolueiden kannatuslukemia tuijottamalla äänestyskäyttäytyminen oli taas melkoista!

Presidentinvaalit ovat kuitenkin selkeästi henkilövaalit, eikä niissä äännestyskäyttäytymistä siksi voi suoraan verrata eduskuntavaaleihin – ne kun taasen ovat puhtaat puoluevaalit. Rakennan näiden vaalien välille kuitenkin pienoisen aasinsillan ja poliittisen kehityskaaren, koska nämähän ovat kaikki arvovaaleja. Ehdokkaat ja puolueet edustavat tiettyjä arvoja ja maailmankuvia, joita sitten kannatetaan tai vastustetaan.

Eduskuntavaalien 2011 jälkeen vihreät syvässä häviöitsesäälissä rypiessään menivät julistamaan, kuinka heille tärkeät arvot nyt kokivat rökäletappion. Sulkeutunut, takapajuinen poliittiikka oli ottanut voiton. Näin siitäkin huolimatta, että edelleenkin kansan enemmistö äänesti myös sellaisia puolueita kuin Kokoomus, SDP ja Vasemmisto. Yli 80% äänesti muita kuin Perussuomalaisia.

Näitä muita puolueita äänestänyt enemmistö jatkoi suruvirttä blogeissa ja sosiaalisessa mediassa nostamalla esiin kokemattomien Perussuomalaisten edustajien sammakoita ja voivottelemalla että hyi kun kauheaa tommonen. Kattokaan nyt tätäkin ehdokasta! Kun oikein meni yli niin vertauskuvat menivät jossain Natsi-Saksan suunnassa. Myönnän, syyllistyin tähän kauhisteluun itsekin. Välillä syystäkin, mutta usein syyttä.

Alkoi myös näkyä merkkejä siitä kuinka syvät kansan perussuomalaiset rivit olivat ottaneet ulkomaalaiset, ulkomaalaisperäiset tai ihan vain muut kuin suomenkieliset sylkykupikseen. Nyt sai vihdoin sanoa! Ruotsinkielisille huudeltiin ja somaleja tönittiin.

Ilmapiiri oli selkeästi muuttumassa synkempään suuntaan. Näin kansainvälisen, avoimen ja modernin puolueen kannattajana tietysti hävetti.

Oikeastaan koko asetelman pystyi summaamaan siihen, että vihreät huusivat perussuomalaisille ja perussuomalaiset vihreille, eikä kukaan ottanut koko hommasta mitään tolkkua. Keskustelua ei ollut.

Kunnes tuli ihan perus Pekka ja otti hommasta kopin.

Kun Haaviston vaalikampanja pyörähti käyntiin, hän suuntasi ensimmäisenä Viitasaarelle, moikkaamaan kaveriaan Hakkaraista (ps). Sitten seurasi koko kiertue ympäri Suomen ja lukuisat TV-esiintymiset, joissa Haavisto antaa kiitosta Perussuomalaisille ja Perussuomalaiset Haavistolle. Koko kampanjan ajan vire oli selkeä; tämä mies kuuntelee ja tämän miehen kanssa voi keskustella.

Jos omassa agendassa on mitään tolkkua, pitää se tietysti myös pystyä perustelemaan. Jos Perussuomalaisten arvoja vastustaa, pitää voida keskustelemalla osoittaa mikä niissä on vikana ja mikä on vaihtoehto.

Näin on Haavisto tehnyt. Haavisto on kuunnellut mikä Perussuomalaisten mielessä Suomessa mättää ja puolestaan kertonut, mikä Perussuomalaisten käytöksessä mättää. Selittänyt, millainen suvaitsemattomuus ei vetele ja miksi.

Monilta on varmaankin mennyt ohi Homma foorumin seminaari joulukuulta “Samaa maata, eri mieltä”, jossa keskusteltiin maahanmuuttokeskustelun sävystä Suomessa. Keskustelu videolla on laadukasta sekä erityisen rauhallista.

Näen tämän nyt niin, että myös Perussuomalaisten suunnasta on tultu Vihreitä vastaan. Ikäänkuin molemmissa leireissä oltaisiin opittu kuuntelemaan, arvostamaan keskustelun toista osapuolta – sekä mikä tärkeintä – viimein myös argumentoimaan ja käyttäytymään sillä tavalla kun politiikkaan kuuluukin. Tajuttu, että ei tarvitsekaan huutaa, että huutamista ei kuuntele muut kuin omat (jos nekään).

Olen nyt yli puolitoista vuotta asunut poissa Suomesta ja viimeksi kävin siellä viime toukokuussa 2011. Luulen, että kun nyt tänä keväänä tulen käymään, saavun hieman erilaisen maan kamaralle. Maahan, jossa ei enää riidellä, vaan jossa taas viimein osataan käyttäytyä. Maahan jossa kaikki ymmärtävät paremmin toisiaan ja jossa toivottavasti myös eri kieliset, –väriset ja –kokoiset ihmiset saavat elää rauhassa.

Kun yksi henkilö kykenee kääntämään poliittisen kulttuurin näin vahvasti parempaan suuntaan, ansaitsee hän myös tulla valituksi johtamaan maata presidenttinä.

Siksi matkustan parin päivän päästä Kuala Lumpuriin äänestämään Haavistoa, koska Haaviston Suomessa on kaikilla paremmin tilaa hengittää.

» Pekka Haavisto
» Sauli Niinistö

by Mikael at January 22, 2012 21:52

January 20, 2012

Whispering of the Stars

Seek knowledge, even in China,

Photobucket
Giambattista Piranesi: “Il Ponte Levatoio/The Drawbridge” (1761).

Suddenly, the temperature has dropped. Last night travelling back in the dark, a large boulder of a man picked me up and he looked at me and asked if he could dunk me in his tea as he did not have any biscuits.
I had two hundred and fifty grams of smoky tea from China in my bag, enough to last me until the summer and most of my hair swiped off like a goat by a man who once worked with Vidal Sassoon and in Hollywood. I didn't think that was so much to be proud of when he spoke of the glory and the celebrities but I like my ears just the way they are and his scissors were sharp. He was from Sicily and expressed dismay at my washing my hair with stinging nettles.

Off for the journey of two thousand kilometres where it will almost be thirty degrees warmer than here. A winter of tea and books and the sea. And a bicycle and a small house of my own. It doesn't feel real, right now, as if good things cannot come without great struggle and pain.
It has already been, I tell myself. Go towards good things.

[title - an old Chinese proverb].

January 20, 2012 00:21

January 19, 2012

Digihitch

Belize and Mexico.

After an entire night of displaying my knowledge of Constellations and physics in general to my small but interested audience in Flores, Guatemala, it was still dark when I caught the next bus to Belize:

January 19, 2012 01:05

The last two weeks in Central America.

The story was written in the picture in front of me:

January 19, 2012 00:56

January 16, 2012

Casa Robino

Temmuzda

dear fatih akin, on behalf of female hitchhikers: thank you for showing us as we are ---

strong, daring, assertive, emotional, patient, crafty, perceptive, resourceful, and still "real".

i love these stereotypes.

read more

by amylin at January 16, 2012 11:00

January 15, 2012

walterheck.com

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-01-16

Are you prepared for #sysadmin disasters? 6 questions to ask yourself in a #disaster recovery plan: http://t.co/CLCMoQ0k #devops #startup # Powered by Twitter Tools

by walterheck at January 15, 2012 23:19

Fabzgy's Life

Shiny January

After dealing with a lot of burrocracy in the last weeks I managed to sneak out of day-to-day work and enjoyed the sunny weekend outside.
On Saturday morning I woke up with a sunray in my face and decided to go hiking. Fetching my map of the region I decided to take Bike/train/bus and start my hike in “Glottertal”.
I decided on the following tour:
On the first 10 km I met one cyclist and a couple of hikers. After reaching the Rosskopf dozens of Freiburgers and tourists met my way which formed a nice contrast. With every step I came closer to Freiburg I met more people taking some time for enjoying the forest. On the first part of my trip I ve even met a fox in the woods.
Now I want to share two pictures with you.Jan, 2012
From snowy hills to the green valley
After approx. 15 km I recognized that my favourite cafe had already closed. So I went back home where a deliciouse Pumpkin-soup was waiting for me.
On Sunday I took my bicycle and rode 50 km in the valley. Now I m tired and I m going to sleep very very well ….

by Fabzgy at January 15, 2012 21:41

Digihitch

Inside Guatemala

Once inside of Guatemala my Central American trip took a change for the better, in that upon meeting an Ex-Pat American with a Guatemalan family I was able to experience a side of the country that many tourists never get to see.

January 15, 2012 02:39

January 14, 2012

Digihitch

Last trip out, Riding with Crazys

Exciting, or scary, It's hard to label. Riding with the drunkest:

January 14, 2012 15:10

January 13, 2012

Digihitch

Hitchhiking, like a Virgin

From LV to LA, and the inertia of a sparkie.

January 13, 2012 16:54

The Trainee

Having Fun in Redwood Country.

January 13, 2012 16:48

January 11, 2012

Whispering of the Stars

to write means to give all,

Photobucket
Letters from a shipwreck - recovered and delivered [source unknown]

migration
some of my writing, hopes and attempts at clarity will be here now - http://birdsongsofpersia.tumblr.com/.
This journal will most likely stay in motion but within another form. It has been dear to me during these last near-on seven years. Thank you all for reading through these turbulent, passionate, sometimes ridiculous growth of times.

With warmth and the promise of hot steaming tea on long winter days,
Jass

January 11, 2012 02:49

January 10, 2012

Digihitch

Close encounter of the wrong kind

Close encounter with the worst kind of person:

January 10, 2012 01:15

Mexico City to Guatemala

After getting somewhat tired of the dramas being played out in my home town of Chino Valley, Arizona and acquiring enough funds to make it happen, I decided that more of Central America was both interesting, available, and therapeutic for what ailed me.

January 10, 2012 01:06

January 09, 2012

Bassdrumben

Back from the dead...or at least mute. It's an update!

My my my, how the days have passed since the last time I sent an update. I completely missed both 2010 and 2011, and those were two of the most eventful years

by bassdrumben at January 09, 2012 04:21

January 06, 2012

Mangomanjaro

Kima

We are proud to finally welcome our daughter Kima Heijbel to the world!
Born in Stockholm on December 26, 3160 g and 49 cm tall.
We’re spending an amazing first month together.
The biggest adventure of our lives has begun.
And truthfully, it has never been better!

by mangomanjaro at January 06, 2012 11:20

Fabzgy's Life

getting older …

A couple of days ago an old friend from primary school visited me at the GartenCoop. We harvested corn salad for a couple of hours and then went to our regular coordination assembly. I have already announced to the other participants that I will just stay for an hour because I did not want to expect from my friend to listen to these debates for too long. We were a surprisingly diverse crowd this time and a lot of issues were raised. Even though he probably did not understand every detail he endured 2,5 hours of our meeting (we had beer so it was not too hard in fact).
Afterwards we went back home to enjoy the lovely pumpkin soup prepared by my granny and had a little wine. In fact due to the discussion beforehand he was pretty much up-to-date with what I am dealing these days in my life. The GartenCoop consumes lots of my time but I do enjoy it!

During our conversation after dinner I figured out that due to my involvement in the long term project GartenCoop I basically lost my desire to travel the world and get to know every corner of this world. I would not say that during my studies I did not like Germany or the places I lived. The problem was that I did not have any projects which fascinated me to that extend the GartenCoop does. For the first time in recent years I do not already plan my travels but plan my year entirely in Germany.

My friend just commented: Yeah – we are getting older…

by Fabzgy at January 06, 2012 09:32

January 05, 2012

gerbennap.waarbenjij.nu

Setting sail for Paramaribo!!

hello all, for you, a little story about big surprises: A little over two weeks ago I went to the airport of Charleroi thinking that that night I would sleep at the airport of Gran Canaria (the plane would arrive around midnight), and that I wo...

January 05, 2012 16:11

Digihitch

Seek first the Kingdom of God ...

... From that moment I only wanted to be with God and do his will because he had saved me from my earthly life and I have now the right to lay all my worries in his hands. And that is where I am going to tell about: One of my Hitchhiking journeys wherein God had revealed me this passage of the Bible:

January 05, 2012 01:31

January 04, 2012

Digihitch

Rooster Burr

Hitchhiking from Riverton to Dubois, Wyoming.

January 04, 2012 00:54

Montpelier, Idaho

Getting a ride in a lumber delivery truck.

January 04, 2012 00:50

January 01, 2012

Digihitch

Northern California

A hitchhiking trip from Dubois, Wyoming to Northern California.

January 01, 2012 04:11

December 30, 2011

A Girl and Her Thumb

Glastonbury High Street

“This song was channelled by a woman called Teresa Matthews… from John Lennon.” Ah yes, this is Glastonbury all right. Earlier on we had a song for balancing the root chakra and another which resonated with the heart. Daniella told us it was derived from the scale on which the Gregorian chants were based, before [...]

by agirlandherthumb at December 30, 2011 23:19

December 27, 2011

Digihitch

Two Nights in Fort Sumner, New Mexico

Getting a ride and helping someone haul railroad ties.

December 27, 2011 15:11

Three Rides

Meeting members of the same family on three different occasions.

December 27, 2011 15:08

December 25, 2011

Digihitch

Talking to a Coyote in the Nevada Desert

I meet a curious coyote while eating a lemon pie.

December 25, 2011 00:47

Prodigal Son

People are put in your path for a reason.

December 25, 2011 00:43

December 23, 2011

Whispering of the Stars

the only way to leave the gallows is by flying,

Photobucket<
by Ben Shahn

Only a soul full of despair can ever attain serenity and, to be in despair, you must have loved a good deal and still love the world.
— Blaise Cendrars

Time in Berlin fell with the snow, gradual and soft, the days almost infinite. I sleep for twelve hours and wake as if from underground, inside myself. The eyes of this city leave me enchanted, powerful beacons of light through the thick, hard winter. I anticipate exploding. I wait, and I wait. For my heart to lurch out through the windows of candlelit slick graffiti bars or into the arms of a ticket inspector of the metro we hop on without tickets. But nothing. Just absence that grows stronger and stronger the more solitude that comes. 
God, I'm so so sorry. I have not been enough. Not for you, not for I.
Too - I have not written enough and my life is not a transformation any longer. All the clarity that came in summer migrated to confused, foolish lands in autumn. And now winter.
But enough is a ridiculous notion.
Berlin, an energy of rebirth. A coat and a sweater given to me for the trip east. Blessings everywhere, despite all this.

Wroclaw - baked bread, tea, all day cooking a Christmas Pudding from my grandmother's old recipe.  
Here the time hurtles by and I don't know what to make of it all. Deep, relentless confusion.
Be as light as the first snowflakes, I tell myself. Be the breath that came out of you when you saw your first moose in North America. Be excitement itself and curious even for the things that are already known. This must be the core and sweetness of what it is to be alive, I'm sure of it. 
To rediscover instinct and to be led on whims and passion. 

December 23, 2011 20:08

Digihitch

Al-Qaeda and the Mafia

A ride from Mount Vernon to Long Creek, Oregon.

December 23, 2011 00:04

December 22, 2011

Whispering of the Stars

a corner that is liveable,

Photobucket

Ko Siu Lan, All That is Rose Melts Into Air, 120 Kg of Rose Petals, India, 2008

Hemingway pacing up and down in his den saying : 'There is another dimension. I am fully aware of it, but I can't get to it'. So he was trapped in his reporting of externals, his faithfulness to the surface, to words actually said.

- James Boyd

An enormous, overwhelming desire for tales to be lost in. To weave, to be woven, to bring everything together.
A satellite heading to earth tonight. I head the other way - far from myself, my doubts, my anxieties, my direction or lack of it. Away from here. The times so dramatically in contrast of belonging, fitting, nesting.
I cycle blind to the beach past midnight. Owls passing over my head, shrews scurrying between my two tyres. They never get hit. I cycle fast to peddle the blues out of me. The moon so bright it burns my skin. Sirens on the bypass, a constant in these days. People torching their own houses, for things have to change. They must. Peddle so hard that my lungs explode, that steam rises from my skin. But I can't get there, cannot touch it or discover it. It will only come when all falls away. I know it too, but must give myself entirely to something, to all.

Past the two broken down trucks, a smoking tin bin fire, the horses. Past the plum trees that have long stopped offering their fruit. Almost Autumn now and golden leaves will take their place. Past the old farm roads, the rusty tower, the rabbits leaping away from me. 
And the gunshots. It's hunting season. For an instant I yearn for a blast to the head. I taunt them, shouting out to them, yelling myself hoarse. 'Take your best shot!', I croon. To be invincible for a moment, to fear nothing, to brave death. But they are too far away and I know it and just as quickly as the desire comes, it soars away and I reach for a pulse once more. For harsh, raw, tender, nectar existence. Turn it to song, to imagination, to wonder and wandering. 
I make a list in my head of all the things I adore. Try not to dwell on who I miss so much, how it all feels impossible right now. That she will not come, that fear will be more powerful than excitement and joy. 
Wild mushrooms, Paris, Rumi, waking up next to Ven. The tingle of new travels, soup in winter, red wine, Anais Nin. Grass dew, tea at sunset. Forests.
Being here and cycling.
The beginnings, once more, of a search for mysticism. I go back east. I listen to the winds of Persia. Climb the hill and scoot back down it, along the thin path to the sea. Cross the two lakes and push up to the dunes. 
A bottle of cider that was dragged back sixty miles in a messenger bag. Eight bottles of it found discarded behind a supermarket. Gave one to my driver who stopped for me, heading to the sea too for kite surfing. The best place in these lands for it. As the waves come to me, close to my feet now. Wrapped up, warm. Ducks flying over me head to sea. Where are we going? I don't know, I murmer to myself. Build yourself up and you can do anything, go anywhere. We forget so often. I could drink the night. I fix my headtorch, like a lighthouse and give myself to my notebook.
All this anxiety, this neurosis, this unfulfilled longing. Just concentrate on these small things and everything else will happen as it may. To make this corner of the earth, small...almost invisible...to make it liveable. More than this - to give it passion, softness and feeling. 
I turn round. A large, dark shape on the dunes. Somehow I'd missed it.
A van.
At this time, it's like an intrusion. As if to find an old shrivelled man sleeping in your bed. I imagine them waking to the sunset and the dawn birds. I turn on back to the sea, opening up.

December 22, 2011 18:44

December 20, 2011

Mangomanjaro

A Different Kind of Challenge

Pontus in a tree!

It’s been over 9 months since we got back from Pakistan and settled for a while in Stockholm, and our baby moved into my belly. Made him/herself comfortable and became the third part of our family. Now that we’re no more than two days (!) from due date, I reflect a lot upon the different kind of adventure that we’ve had the privilege to meet this year.

Travelling around the world is a big challenge. Constantly meeting new people, new scenarios, adjust, adapt, stay alert, keep the energy and passion even if your money run out or you loose your way. But in a way I find all that very easy, very natural. When we’re on the move, we are also “served” with experiences. Automatically fascinated and amused by the world around us as we gain new skills and knowledge. I’m not saying travelling is only easy, but it’s part of a travelers nature to discover and soak up the new atmosphere. Inspired to tell, to write, to share and learn.

Since March when we moved to Stockholm and started working regular jobs again, we’ve obviously been a lot more stationary. Especially due to the pregnancy and me vomiting 15 times a day for a few months. That makes me philosophize about what’s more challenging; to travel the world or to stay just as inspired in your daily, stationary life? Both, I’m sure, in their own ways as the grass often seems to be greener on the other side. For me personally right now, I know the answer :) !

Make no mistake; I am incredibly happy and I’m doing excellent. We are so excited to meet our baby that our apartment shivers, and I absolutely LOVE living the life I live right now! All I want is to remind you all including myself for the new year ahead, that making your weekdays feel fresh and new is a challenge worth credit. To keep lifting your chin above the wall, to keep looking AROUND the corner you pass every day on your way home from work, that takes some effort.

We are inspired by our friends, by making bread and baking cakes, by our mango baby plant, meeting couchsurfers (although it’s been a while now), picking mushrooms in Gotland and spending time with each other and the kicking belly. What ever you do in your daily life, it will be just as much fun as YOU make it! Merry Christmas to those of you who will celebrate it and a happy new year to all you njaros out there!

Amanda

by mangomanjaro at December 20, 2011 12:41

December 19, 2011

Compared With Me You Are All Tourists

Home through the eyes of a stranger

One evening this September, I was watching a shitty DVD while lying on the sofa out in the vast hall of our squatted car repair shop where we arranged what we call our living room out of a large square of moquette and a rather wild assembly of furniture once found on a scrapheap. Next to me, somewhat squeezed, was Andy, who had recently charmed me with his assumption that the capital city of Finland was "Heineken".

It had been a rainy evening, and the sound of water drops plopping in the back of the hall reverberated over to us through the dark. In the past our living group had tried several times to fix the leaks in the roof with asphalt cartridges or tarpaulin, but evidently it had proven too formidable a task for us. This made the atmosphere rather spooky, especially late in the night as it was now.

It was already two o'clock when abruptly our cosy-eerie get-together was interrupted by Eline's voice echoing over from the entrance via the former reception desk: "Hoi Iris, ik heb een verjaardagskadootje voor jou!" It wasn't my birthday, but, hey, whatever, I propped myself up on my elbows and turned my head. Accompanying our friend as she approached was a young, stridently blond woman. "Here, I found a chick for you to speak Russian to," Eline introduced the girl jokingly, and after asking her to sit down, added with a wink, "thought you would like her".

Natasha was her name and she told me she had just run into Eline after having been desperate enough to choose a Centraal Station train platform as a publically available bed. She had been dropped off around an hour earlier in Amsterdam by a driver who had picked her up hitchhiking all the way back in France. After having reached his destination in Western Belgium, he had taken it upon him to do the long, 250 kilometer haul to the Dutch capital city, seemingly entirely out of a mixture of sheer kindness and a good measure of boredom... until he proposed to drive her all the way to Berlin a few days later, if she'd first come back to Belgium with him.
The girl declined, and that was that.

Natasha was a Russian beauty from Nizhny Novgorod with water-blue eyes and near-translucent skin, adorning herself with elaborately ornamented silver and turquoise earrings. The jewelry didn't mean she wasn't a tough girl. For her it was the end of a two months hitchhiking and wild camping trip around Spain and Portugal, and she was on her gradual way home. In Barcelona all her valuable belongings and money had been stolen out of the tent she and a friend had pitched on the beach, and she was left with a 20 Euro bill handed to her by a French travel mate from a week back.
Conditions being as they were she announced, "I am leaving straight away tomorrow morning".
Supine Andy groaned that he wanted to hear what the actors were saying, but me and Eline, after a short translation action on my part, began to remonstrate vociferously : "You can't just come and breeze through like that, you have to at least come on a bike tour around the city tomorrow!"

Natasha's opinion could be swayed. She was to be with us the following day.

Being the house's only Russian speaker, I automatically became the designated tourist guide. It turned out to be raining cats and dogs, and coming from our house in the rather far out yet lovely, canal and river-streaked suburb of Zeeburg, by the time we'd reached the centre already we were soaked to the skin. Natasha was none the less enthusiastic. I asked what she wanted to see first, and the answer was direct and curt: The Red Light District. And not only that, she wanted to see "those girls behind their window panes."

For inexplicable reasons, despite having lived this long in Amsterdam, I had no real idea how to precisely locate the hookers and their walk-in windows and had to touch-feel my way around the Red Light District. We started along Warmoestaaat, one of the oldest streets of Amsterdam, a touristy main artery adjacent to the real seedy areas of town. It is lined with innocuous pubs and the one or other sexshop. On our way we came across what you can really also see elsewhere in the city centre: Naked female mannequins wearing strap-on dicks, vitrines stuffed with granny fetish porn, and drunken Germans hanging drunkenly out of coffeeshop doors shouting "Scheiße, Scheiße" at this still early forenoon hour. Ducking into a small alleyway to the left, and then again left, we finally found the stuff Natasha wanted; dapper young ladies behind glassdoors, strutting their stuff under the soft glow of crimson tinted lamps in nothing but black bras and panties. She was positively thrilled of her discovery, "Какие они красивые!" - "Wow, what beautiful girls!" One young lady, having wrapped herself up in a large dark towel, was just striding out on dizzyingly high high-heels, leaving her door open. Natasha and I glanced inside and could see all sorts of mountaineering equipment, with which the lady was daily tying up up expectedly large, quivering mountains of customers to mount them and flagellate and generally mistreat. "Look at all the stuff she has in there! Handcuffs, whips, studded leather straps!", Natasha shrieked happily.
Around us, all other tourists were men alone. One Dutch guy stood out who looked about 16 years of age, affecting airs of having stranded here by accident and being the least of all interested in the women on show, casting only sidelong glances at them; although we presently would see him come circling around the same alleyway a second time. A fat Italian guy with his group of homies was negotiating half-jokingly, leaning to the brick wall near one of the display windows fractionally held ajar by the "inmate" on the other side, just enough so her voice could be filter through; "nah, I think I will come back after a few pints with my mates", the Italian seemed to be saying, then waddled off after his friends.


Next, Natasha was less interested in seeing some of the quainter small streets and canals of the Jordaan, as I proposed, than in doing a round of the famous squats, real deal or legalized. So we breezed on, through the rain, to the other side of the city centre, through the verdant Vondelpark and the villas exorbitant in size and comforts surrounding it. I took her all this way to catch a glimpse of the Occii, the formerly squatted now legalized punk rock club, and seriously one of the most beautiful ancient buildings of Amsterdam. It still being early in the day and the place being closed, we could only glance at the façade, but that being the Occii's prime touristic allurement, that may have been all the better. I myself remembered the building from before the summer, remembered the moldy, dark wood carvings whose desolate state spoke of the great age of the building, and found its newly renovated, particoloured and shiny as if lacquered, present state rather tacky.

On we went to the Hallen, the imposing former tramway depot. Robbie having left her bike there some Friday bar-night and having handed me the key to pick it up turned out a perfect excuse for ringing the bell and letting Natasha see the building's entrails. Its inside being similar to our own industrial area squat, although a bit larger, and maybe even damper, it was the outside, the vastness and the gloom of the row of high gables under the cloudy sky that Natasha found more impressive than the saw-tooth roof of our own current home back in Zeeburg.

We went to the wonderfully cheap and multicultural neighbourhood market round the corner to buy a small picknick, then we popped into a big-chain supermarket where, taking into account that all her money had been stolen, I looted all the ingredients for Natasha to cook Borshchsh later on tonight for the gang at home. On the way back, we rode through parts of Amsterdam home to my own or our living group's shared history in the city, and I could not stop myself from telling stories.

First we cycled past the bar my friends from another, smaller town squatted one and a half years ago, with whom I first came to the city, helping them with the action and the first week's occupation.
About ten days after the opening of the squat, I had just had a quick breakfast and gone out the house, as one of the lads, Matt, was trodding around in his pyjamas probably searching for the coffee, when a man politely knocked outside at the door. Neighbbours had been regularly presenting themselves in this way, and Matt, in all innocence suspecting nothing, unlocked the door from inside and... - found himself grabbed like a kitten by the scruff of the neck and put out on the street in his socks. Around the corner, in a blind spot from the door, eight other men had stood in wait, and they were now flowing inside, quick to change the lock. Then they dug into the crate of beer they brought along for the occasion, much like squatters themselves do the day of an action.
Now, the nice detail was that at those times, squatting was still legal, and Matt being the legal resident had no qualms about going to the police. So in the very same evening, it was Matt, Étienne, I and our friends back in there, drinking their beer.
It is not always possible to rely on the righteousness of the law-enforcers, but when it happens, it can have some amusing outcomes.

Although, to be honest, I don't know why I still tell this story. Matt and Étienne clearly were fly-by-night squatters. They had not even barricaded the door in the simplest of fashions.
Coming to think of it, maybe Matt was actually lucky, being so harmless and naïve to even open the door for the guys. A gang of musclemen assembled for the very purpose of coming in would probably have been ready for rather more distressing actions.

The next stop on Natasha's and my road was a house where I lived for a few months: "A friend of mine from a smaller city started it. She knew the location and figured as a squat it would might have a chance to last a while. In the last minute before the action, she ended up giving her room away to someone else, being from then on involved only as an outsider. The first few months the one-house squat bided its time quietly, but then, in the summer, the three houses next to it were occupied by squatters as well, and the whole thing rapidly swole up into a city-wide campaign against the company owning the dilapidated structures, the speculation giant Ymere. Not a week went past that there wasn't at least a small notice about it in one of the national newspapers."
That I (luckily) had already moved out when that sort of craziness started and am on bad terms with most of the members of this particular gang of hippies today, I conveniently left out.

Then, as we began crossing a bridge over the river Amstel, I pointed my finger at a row of appartment blocks on the other side, nice examples of riverine architecture: "It was in one of the appartments of those houses, that we all met, Eline, Robbie and I".
It was Eline and her friend Dirk's plan to squat two adjacent properties each one million Euros worth. The space required more people though. Eline somehow chanced upon this new girl Robbie, whereas Dirk invited his friend Dotty, who invited her friend Dolly, who invited her friend Iris, that is, me.
The action itself had rather more political motives than being a good plan for setting up a domicile: Still a few years ago, the building had been ascribed for social housing. The inhabitants however had got evicted, in order to renovate the flats and sell them for a much higher price. The owner at the time was a well-known speculant and low rank Mafiosi, the middleman for big scale drug-dealers, white-washing money through buying up immobilia. He finally had died through a bullet in his head in 2004, after which the house was sold to the large Estate company Libra.
When so much money as a million Euros is involved, it could only be expected that we would last no more than three weeks in the habitations, which is exactly what happened.
Yet, new friendships were visibly kindled. We were the core of the living group of the new industrial squat we were to open, around whom a bigger group finally gelled.

Natasha was getting dizzy from all the talk and exclaimed, "Jesus, I want to come and live in Amsterdam. How can I get a job here?"

That evening at dinner, with our house group of eight complemented by our two guests, Andy and Natasha, all of us slobbering tasty Borshchsh (typical Russian vegetable soup bloodred from the beetroot in it), and with everyone joking around and laughing, I guess it was exactly what Dutch people call gezellig - convivial, cosy, fun.
At the dinner table, Natasha spotted a cute guy, and started riotously flirting with him. The cute guy was Andy. Always one quick to accomodate myself to the fact that my lovers will be snitched by lassies of a more extroverted fibre, I resigned myself to do nothing but sort of wiggle my chair further away from the table and let the free love axiom run its course.

Anyway, later on that night, I correctly assumed Andy would be up for coming along on an evening adventure: Eline and I wanted to round off the evening by taking Natasha to a coffee shop, an activity she had wished for during the daytime. It just so happened that on our way to Muntplein, where we knew a nice exemplary, I wanted to get some beer, because neither Natasha nor I actually smoked weed. So I spurted into a supermarket and pilfered a six-pack, which spurted mucho-macho Andy, peeved at my superior stealing skills, into wanting to outdo me, so he pilfered another one... Suddenly we had a lot of beer, and somehow we ended up in a park, drinking.

Not too late after midnight, the beer was finished and the air started to become night-time nippy. Time to go home. Natasha had expressed interest in the archetypal Dutch experience of riding on the rear carrier, usually a rather uncomfortable way of travelling, although in the given case it was probably msotly an excuse to be able to pat Andy's back. So Eline and I took our two bikes, leaving the couple with the third one we had brought and shouted: "Andy, just don't forget to take your girlfriend with you!"

The next day, after breakfast, Natasha stood bright-eyed at the kitchen table, said she had a gut feeling it was time to leave, hitchhike on. On Tuesday her school started, 400 km East of Moscow, some 3000 km from here.
The whole group of us protested emphatically: "You cannot leave yet, you only spent two nights here, that is hardly a flattering gesture of you to want to leave!", each and every of us providing a different reason for her to abide with us for just a few more days. After all the incalculable hospitality I personally have received around the world, I must honestly say I was extremely happy my so very disparate group of housemates, bike-nerd Tobbie, opium-eyed Matza, trippy-hippy Eline, and usually so lackadaisical Robbie were all so readily and unreservedly hospitable.
In the end, Natasha's gut feeling won over our collective expostulations though, and Eline, Robbie and I got Tobbie's car and drove Natasha to the motorway.

Our road took us past the kringloopwinkel (that's a second hand shop) round the corner, over the bridge under which Matza spraypaints his artwork, over the riparian, lush greenery hugging the IJ's confluence with the IJmeer, straight past the student homes we sneak in to wash our laundry for free. There we turned into a garage to tank up and buy a last souvenir, a packet of drop (liquorice).
At the exit back to the ring road, another hitchhiker. Eline, ever the communicator, approached him. He was a German student, living in the very same student residence we know so well, and who had just walked out his door and started hitching from right there. Bad idea, he had been there for an hour already. Heading he was to Hamburg for the birthday of his older brother.
That is more than half the way to Berlin, where our guest was heading for.
Great news for Natasha who now had a hitch-hiking partner.

Indeed, she was duly delighted, "Oh cool, I think I'm going to Hamburg next!"

by Cyaxares_died (noreply@blogger.com) at December 19, 2011 10:39

"Hell, yeah"

At the end of our street lives a man whose remarkable skills and talent I cannot laud enough, whose virtues and good intent it is impossible to exaggerate: He has refined the great art of vodka distilling. His products indeed excel in quality, and can usually be ranged somewhere on a scale between delicious and ambrosial, except the one or other misfired jugful every eight weeks or so.
The house where he lives is a curiosity in and of itself. Having initially been a glue factory, it was used after several years of emptiness as a building for the Dutch police to train themselves on evicting squats. They would move in once or twice a month, smash in doors just to replace them, saw through barricaded windows or even the roof. This sort of business went on up until the day before the squatting action. Reparing work on the building evidently represented an almost sisyphian task, but the squatters did an ingenious job of it and live in a very cosy and even rather swank place now, almost two years later.

But back to Aad, and why I write about him here. At the end of the nineties this guy went on a quite incredible round-the-world trip with his brother. In a small port on the Dutch island Texel, they "abducted" an over 20-metres long luxury yacht which was worth something to the tune of two million Euros; then they sailed it around the world for one and a half years.
They started off sailing down to Spain and Portugal. From there their prime intent was to move away as fast as possible from the police on their heels, choosing whichever direction the trade winds would take them. This happened to be first to Madeira, then across the Atlantic to Brazil.

Initially I was sceptical about Aad's story. You hear all sorts of people making up all sorts of tall tales after all. So, I tried to verify at least one partof it: Aad said at the end they abandoned the yacht in Senegal and he hydro-hitchhiked from Dakar North on a ship transporting French wines.
Having myself worked on a cargo ship in Senegal in the year 2003, I was in a good position to ask those of my sailor friends who were there before me, whether such a ship as Aad claimed existed. In my time in Senegal and neighbouring countries, there was no single other vessel transporting anything except the one we were on ourselves, the Oméga, a French owned, Tonga-flagged eighty meter long cargo ship which carried anything, from carparts to rice sacks. Those sailor friends I asked informed me from the nineties until 2002 there indeed was a ship that did the very route Aad asserted, that is from Senegal to France carrying wine. Its route was nicknamed Le Tour du Pomerol, Pomerol being a kind of French wine. The near-infinite stacks of alcohol sure must have kept Aad happy for the time of the voyage.
This is no proof, but I am not completely disinclined to believe Aad's story after all.

It usually being three or four in the morning when we chatted, I have forgotten most of the numerous anecdotes Aad told me from his journey. There is only one story I have been able to retain, one about Italy, from the very end, when Aad and his brother got arrested. The two of them spent the initial few weeks of their two year prison stint in Italian jails, before being sent to their home country, the Netherlands.
"Sure, the cells were more squalid, but on being transferred to Dutch prisons, there was one outstanding feature which made me wish I had remained down South: They gave you a pack of wine each Friday there. It wasn't enough for the whole week, but it got you sufficiently drunk for a day. In my second week, I went on a short, alcohol-fuelled prison riot. I managed even to kick down one of my cell's walls - it was a very old jail as you can imagine. In consequence they first they put me in solitary confinement, but later they had me change cells, and put me together with six Moroccans. They were all Muslims, so that meant I had six times the ration of alcohol. I could not have wished for a better result of my violent outburst! "

There is one question Aad is understandably asked a lot: Were two entire years of being locked up worth the 18 months trip around the world?

"Hell yeah", is his answer.

by Cyaxares_died (noreply@blogger.com) at December 19, 2011 10:37

December 18, 2011

walterheck.com

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-12-19

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by walterheck at December 18, 2011 23:19

gerbennap.waarbenjij.nu

Back in the saddle!

Saddle... boat... oh well, you get the picture. But before I go further into this whole new thing I'm starting, I'd like to take the opportunity to thank all the people that have sent me encouragement of all kinds in the past weeks. Getting shipwreck...

December 18, 2011 10:58

Digihitch

The Closest I Ever Got To Hypothermia

Getting wet and cold hitchhiking from Texas to Kansas.

December 18, 2011 01:30

Tim! We Thought You Were Dead!

This story reminds me of John Wayne movie.

December 18, 2011 01:28

December 16, 2011

Digihitch

LIVE!

Fellow human beings, go forth and travel!

December 16, 2011 01:32

Journey to Nowhere

I've been on the road now for two years . . .

December 16, 2011 01:25

December 15, 2011

Whispering of the Stars

redoublement des mystiques,

how we talk
together in the snow,
- Bahauddin


The need of deep creative destruction, songs to the arctic owl. Two degrees outside and travelling becomes a suffering to be sharpened and plunged deep into my stomach. Ven sleeping close to me upon the last night on earth, our last together for I don't know how many days or months or years as she makes her return back to Bulgaria and I must at last figure out what it is that I want to do beyond all, past motion, past whatever rabbits jump out of my hat. What is it that I'm doing after all of this? Where is my writing at the ends of the earth?
Try my best not to feel the abandonment, the desolation of a life alone once more. I ask if we just didn't want this life here. Four days together, passing in a stampede of blues.The maddened cold days of Copenhagen. They crawl into our words as irritations build en mass, flattened under the rails by trains carrying wingless birds. Loved, in love and will love but can no longer expect the miraculous to leap out of every street corner. I must have the strength to search it out at least.
The most logical thing. Bounding up to Scandinavia in winter could lose me my fingers. What is it that I'm becoming, growing to? If we are strong enough, we will make it through all. Horses galloping through ice-storms inside of me.  To create an astonishing existence, finally.

December 15, 2011 14:03

December 14, 2011

Digihitch

September 1, 2011

I go into the city after a summer in the mountains:

December 14, 2011 09:47

December 11, 2011

walterheck.com

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-12-12

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by walterheck at December 11, 2011 23:19

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-12-12

Rich polluters are trying to kill #COP17 climate talks in #Durban but a new #GreenDreamTeam can stop them. Act now! http://t.co/7q5TaziU # New blog: 8 reasons we use #puppet for #DevOps / #systemadministration http://t.co/K5iNpyPY # Powered by Twitter Tools

by walterheck at December 11, 2011 23:19

December 09, 2011

December 08, 2011

Compared With Me You Are All Tourists

Given that this was Iran, that it was Ramadan, and that it was already noon time, it seemed about the right moment to get drunk. We started off with some shots of moonlight whisky with mint and lemon cordial, then followed up with vodka that was good enough to be downed straight.

The way to procure alcohol in this country is to call up the person that amounts to the equivalent of a (drug) dealer in Europe. Beer not being popular they will let you choose from the types of wine and liquors at hand over the phone, either homemade or imported. Imports are the more expensive option. Then you will usually be given an appointment somewhere on the streets. The "dealers" are men from young to middle age, dressed in varying degrees of neatness or sloppiness, all generally respectable people, nowhere in the vicinity of the European prototype of a drugdealer in terms of sleaziness.
They wait in a car somewhere, you walk up and exchange a few bills with one or two bottles of your chosen poison wrapped up in black plasticbag that you promptly slip in your rucksack or handbag. One dealer once gave my friend Maryam an appointment right in front of a police station. Even though supremely awkward, it certainly was the safest option, said my friend. The police at the station trust people who meet just outside their door intuitively, and it can be glaringly incongruous for a prim 20-something to walk up to a battered old Paykan with a balding fifty-something wearing slacker's clothes at the steering wheel. I don't know if being safer is necessarily true for the police station scenario. Some people might get so nervous, their visibly shaky hands would certainly give them away and attract the police's attention.
In any case, to remedy such predicaments, in Teheran there is even door-to-door service.

As for my friend Pouya and me, we were soon off to take a taxi to his friends' house. It was hard to stop the bottles in my bag from clunking against each other, making that sound that only wine bottles can make. This would have been too risky on a public bus.

Having arrived in the luxurious appartment in Northern Teheran, where the Alborz mountains loomed seemingly within touching distance outside the window, the general atmosphere was one of laid-back nonchalance. Everyone was there with their boyfriend and the bong circulated as Hollywood movies rotated in the DVD player. I felt like I might have just as well been in a rich kids' parents' appartment in the 16th arrondissement in Paris, or elsewhere in Europe.

Mahan leaned back on the couch holding the bong with both hands on his lap, informing me, "so many of my friends like opium, they smoke it all the time, opium is just anywhere in this country," only to add, tapping his thigh with the lighter that was balanced on his knee, "but I just love my weed."
As for personal, anecdotal evidence, in rural Iran I had certainly seen my share of opium-smokers, although in Teheran marijuana had seemed to me thus far to prevail.

Pseudo-philosophical conversation kept flowing, annoying me just as much as the brainless flicks on the plasma TV. There were moments when you were reminded you were in Iran: Like When the girls got up and served a platter of sliced watermelon to everyone, then took away the plates to share doing the dishes between themselves.

The risk of it being too great, Iranians don't go out of the house once they are drunk. So I was stuck with the rich kids for the remainder of the day. It was a good thing I could medicate my ennui with the red wine for those few hours.

In the night Pouya had planned to go to some sort of birthday party. It seemed to be one of those Teherani parties where men and women mingle freely, the females wearing deep decolletés and having their hair styled up, everyone nibbling on canapés and sipping on glasses of whisky on the rocks. I had never attended such a party, but heard and read much about them, so I was curious. Organizing the evening was Pouya's official girl-friend, a suppposedly platonic affair(I don't know if that's true).
Turned out though that the plan fell through. It just happened so that today the girl-friend had a chat with Pouya's mother, and found out about some recent cavortings of his (while not being exactly happy about my presence neither). Whereas on the phone she sounded supremely cheesed off, when we were at the doorstep of her tower block flat, -her leaning out of the door with her long hair flowing down over her skimpy cocktail party dress with the (not particularly appealing) party music spilling out onto the street from the closed appartment door behind her- she worked herself right up into a frenzy, producing an unabating flow of reprehensions, ultimately rejecting us. As we turned away, deciding to go for a stroll through the city instead, Pouya told me sourly in his discontent that every girlfriend of his always had a separate relationship with his mother, "They talk to each other to find out more about me. The girls to get to know me, my mother to control me."

We walked through the Ramadan night, grabbing free tea and sweets to nurse our onsetting hangovers at some sort of band stand in the neighbourhood. Enormous loudspeakers blared noisy trance music weirdly inappropriate for the holy occasion.

by Cyaxares_died (noreply@blogger.com) at December 08, 2011 12:56

December 07, 2011

Digihitch

Hitchhiking in South Korea

Hitchhiking in south Korea is super easy:

December 07, 2011 01:14

December 04, 2011

walterheck.com

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-12-05

First post: tips on finding rockstar engineers (freelancers or employees) for your startup: http://t.co/Wu04p6Yo # Urgent Maintenance Announcement for http://t.co/nKT5iL0y site and monitoring dashboard: http://t.co/L8BcHvER # Powered by Twitter Tools

by walterheck at December 04, 2011 23:19

Whispering of the Stars

that agony will be our triumph,

Photobucket

The Ingoldsby penance. John Tenniel, from The Ingoldsby legends, by Thomas Ingoldsby (Richard H. Barham), New York, 1848.

and then the lights come on
in the middle of the night,
what should I do with my life,
how should I spend my time?
- the music of Cocorosie


Eastern France. Rallying instinct together once more. A flute teacher took me here after being approached in a reststation some 300km south of Paris saying that his car was full, that it was full of animals, that it could not possibly hold us all. Stepping in, he had to move his flute. It was his music, the giraffes, he was speaking of, you see.
After he agrees, he becomes flabbergasted that I am not completely mad. That there is a certain kindness to my voice, to my words despite my life and the way things sometimes go. That I call myself a writer if I must call myself anything at all but that I have never been published, that I could never create a product from that far inside. Instead, I write little and sometimes explode with words. I tell him all this in my second tongue and he understands and tells me that he has never been creative, has only ever followed the masters of classical orchestras. 
I tell him : one day it will rip you open, this need to create and you must follow it to the end of the world, inside yourself or out of you. 
You promise?
He smiles and tells me that I am young but old at the same time and one day he would like to read my writing.
My constant movement is my mask in front of my creativity, I say. I've not given myself the chance to sit down and let it all out of me. It was always something else. I fear I will go to my grave even if I am young now with it still inside of me. Most of all I must give hope to the darkest of times, else all is lost from my life. 
You ever think that? I ask him.
He replies in English, this time. 
Yes. Yes I do. 

Small mountains beside the river. Reading beside it, scrawling notes of upheaval : a little boy approaches me and announces 'bonjour monsieur'. Bonjour monsieur', I reply back, grinning and he flaps his arms and bounds away.
Hikes far up into the sky. Mulled wine, The Taste of Cherry, incense, lentil soup - winter. 

I get up before the sun today and walk the city as the rain coats me in song upon my skin. So far, so long, so distant. What it is to burn in the cold winter morning. Ven returning back to Bulgaria without us even having met in Denmark. It will be too much for her to travel in winter to find somewhere else. The Patisserias opening up, lifting their shutters. Freshly baked bread, the first pot of coffee at cafés, the sweeping rain painting my cheeks. Winter coming - soon, today perhaps will be the first snow. And in a day, or two, I will leave one thousand two hundred kilometres east or almost an equally journey north. My sleeping bag that is not ready for winter and now we have no place to live once more and together I do not know how to provide comfort and stability. Alone I would just go south, further and further until a town draws me in, to write in an attic all winter long and sometimes to teach. 
But it is not what I want at all. I need us but is it possible after all this, after all the instinct to it and for it? 
The old Roman thrones, men prancing down the road with long baguettes resting underneath their arms. I soften the anxiety, shut out the world and let music fill my ears. A cat watches me from a window with curiosity. The sun will begin to rise soon, I tell myself, the world is not a grave. Wandering headless into winter. You have never had much of a need for a head, I tell myself. And onwards.

December 04, 2011 11:14

December 03, 2011

Digihitch

Some Sheetrock, a Sawman and a Hitchhiker

A hitchhiker helps a sawman unload some sheetrock.

December 03, 2011 15:23

My first: A successful failure

How an almost complete failure at hitchhiking completely sold me on its wonders.

December 03, 2011 15:18

November 30, 2011

Digihitch

Southwards (Part 3)

The first miserable steps of a life changing journey...

November 30, 2011 20:10

The wonders of vagabonding in Brazil

Vagabonding adventures in the south of Brazil!

November 30, 2011 03:16

A Walk in the Sun

A hitchhiker and a dog walk from Montana into Wyoming on I-90.

November 30, 2011 03:13